


A friend

by FernShaw



Category: Hollow Knight (Video Games)
Genre: Cloth is just feeling really bad, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Psychological Trauma, Suicide Attempt, Suicide Idealisation, Traitor lord fight didn't happened here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:15:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25714933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FernShaw/pseuds/FernShaw
Summary: Cloth just wanted an epic battle to end her life, but she didn't get any chance for it.So ... What now ?
Comments: 5
Kudos: 23





	A friend

Hallownest was a big place, filled with dangers and challenges. A place to die a hero, a place to have fierce opponents. Yet... Cloth felt incredibly alone and weak.

The deepnest was horrible. Not really a challenge if you forgot about the spikes all around the place, and the creatures were just scary and trying to trick you. That was not a place to die as a hero. Only a place to be impaled on pointy spikes and rot in silence, forgotten by all.  
Anything underground was no better. Malweks and shadow creepers running around were a pain, and once again, too scary. The hive wasn't a threat at all, simply poor brainwashed citizens that did their best to still protect their beloved home. And the coloseum of fools had a name that described it perfectly. It was a place for fools, one that seeked a painful and meaningless death just for the sake of battles. It was incredibly scary to see that people actually went to such place and she had a hard time believing it until she saw the numerous corpses falling down from the top of the kingdom's edge. It made her feel sick to the core.

She thought that Hallownest would be the place for her to get her eternal rest, but she was once again wrong. She had no options to get an honorable death. She was never going to see Nola again.

She wanted to see her friend, so bad it hurted. She did everything to be able to have a death similar to hers, hoping that it would make them see each other once again when her time would come. She admired Nola, she really did. It was not only her best friend, but her exemple in life. Loosing her was really a shock, and she never got better after it. And once again, she wasn't able to reach her.

The cicada looked around her. The fading town of Dirtmouth had a nice feeling to it, but she wasn't able to feel any happiness at the moment. She could only see everyone trying their best to cheer up with a little taste of disgust and perhaps jealousy. She was happy, before. She wanted to be once again. And all could she see was her failures. Perhaps that if the little knight didn't tame the mantis tribe they would've made nice warriors. Perhaps she could've helped the knight. That would've made happy. But now, she wasn't. And that's all she could feel. That emptiness, that uselessness. She would've liked to cry, but that was something she also forgot to do a long time ago.

After a little while, she saw the knight coming into town. It was nice to see them alive, at least. All of she could say to them was truth : she would soon leave Hallownest to once again wander in quest of new people to fight against. The little knight could only nod and salute her. She would never seen them again. Perhaps that was for the best.

She decided to get out of the village not long after that. She wanted this fight as soon as possible, so it was better to go fast.

The Cicada wandered in the king's pass, admiring for one last time the beauties of such place. The lumaflies and king statues all around the kingdom were something she was going to miss, that was sure. It had a familiar tone to it. It was ... Nice.

But looking around like that made it difficult for her to check her surroundings. It was mostly tiktiks and vengeflies roaming around, yes. Mostly. And one step on the side was enough to seal her fate. She felt it, spikes slowly destroying her feet as she walked into them, but she was too slow to react. She didn't have the time to grab the edge of the cliff and simply fell into the metallic hell, feeling her body in pure pain for a few seconds. She fought for consciousness for a small amount of time yet clearly saw that there was nothing to do. She was going to perish like that, and wouldn't be able to do anything against it. How ironic. She escaped deepnest thinking that she wanted to live, only to die with the same date that she would've met there.  
... How ironic.

When she opened her eyes, she felt that she was clearly not dead yet. But she wasn't in spikes either. Her first reflex was to stand up and see what was going on yet the amount of pain she felt only made her get back down with a scream. Thoses spikes clearly weren't a dream, but why was she like that ? She moved her head a little, seeing that her body wasn't covered with her usually clothes. Bandages. Someone took the time to save her and make sure she was safe. But who ? And most importantly, why ?

"Oh you're awake ? Sorry, I know, it's uncomfortable but it's really better if you don't move for now."

Cloth weakly looked at the face of the bug who arrived in the room, probably hearing her scream.

"Who... Are you ?"

"I'm the Nailmaster Mato. I'm guessing you're here to ask to be trained ? I saw your weapon earlier. It has a lot of potential if you know how to use it."

"I'm not here to be trained ..."

"Oh ! I see. Well, that is true, if you carry this kind of weapons you probably already know how to use it."

Cloth took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. She was frustrated. She was supposed to die there. A stupid, careless and non-heroic, that's what she deserved. But she couldn't be angry at someone who just saved her. It made no sense. So she just tried to compose herself and ask a simple question.

"Why did you save me ?"

"Why you ask ? I'm an old lonely man who sees a young girl in serious need of help right in front of my house. Who am I to to just leave you here to die ? You're too young for that. You have so much to live for, and it cost me nothing to do so. Do you want tea ? I just made a little bit of it. It's not the best, I didn't have anyone to drink it with me for a long time, but it does the job I think."

"And what if I don't have something to live for ?"

"Huh ?"

The room went silent. Just Mato Staring at Cloth and Cloth staring at the ground. It was a simple thing yet it mattered. Cloth didn't want to live.

"I don't have anything to live for. I just wanted to end it back there. I'm just ... It's ..."

It was hard to express such feeling. Any normal bug had this instinct of doing everything could to survive, but cloth didn't want any of it. Life was a pain. It was better not to continue with it. Yet she didn't expected to see the old man to immediately get next to her, hug her and checking even more if everything was alright.

"Are you okay ? Did something happened ? Please, I'm here to listen if you want to talk about it, just don't ... Don't say such things ..."

Cloth started shaking without realizing it. She wasn't able to put everything she thought into words. Simply because she didn't even thought of telling about it before. It was a feeling for her. Because she was feeling bad, and it wasn't supposed to be for others, right ? So ... Why did she wanted for him to listen so badly ?

"I just... I don't have anyone anymore. And I want to leave this place with a battle but I can't find anyone to fight and kill me. I want to see my best friend anymore. I don't want to face her like someone weak who never did what she did. Because she was ... She was so great and now ... She's gone. And I won't see her again. And I want to and I just can't do it anymore ..."

"Shhh ... It's normal to feel that way, alright ? It must've been difficult to get through something so horrible. But you know what ? I think your friend would feel bad if you died in a battle just to please her. I'm sure she cared about you, a lot. And when people care about you, they want the best for you. And you know what would probably be the best for you now ? To seek for a new goal, not to just die. You have a long life to live. You can make new friends, have new adventures, learn new things ... It would be sad for her to learn that you never experienced that just because you liked her so much, right ?"

Cloth stopped and thought. Was this true ? Was this what Nola was thinking about ? But ... She never thought of it that way. Was this good ? Was he telling the truth ?

"But ... I'm a coward. I've had occasions to battle and I always fled."

"No. That's fear. And that is the most normal thing to feel. If someone tells me he doesn't fear anything, they're either a liar or an idiot. Do you imagine what would you do without fear ? You could've set a random fire and put your arm in it to "see how it feels". That's something to keep in mind."

Everything ... All of the words coming out of his mouth made sense. It was so weird. Was this the truth ? If it was, why didn't she thought about it before ? It was ... So confusing ...

"And ... How do you get a new purpose."

"Do you like anything ?"

"... I don't know. I think singing is nice. And nails look fun to use. But ... That's all I've got."

"Well you can always try things around theses ! I had a passion for nails. And I've learned a lot about them just because I could. And little by little I became a nail master, and no I feel proud of myself. Not just because I can do something but because I wanted to do it in the first place. And you don't have to stick with it you whole life ! My brother, Sheo, he was a nail master for a long time. But one day he felt like he was just unhappy with it. But then he discovered art. And he left everything because that felt like the right choice. I'm sad that we can't battle anymore but ... He is happy and so am I. See ? You can ask anything you want."

"... But I don't have anyone."

"H-hey ! That's not a nice thing to say ! I'm right here you know, young lady !"

"But ... Can you be my friend ?"

"I don't see why not."

"... Do you think you could teach me about nails ?"

The face of the Nailmaster lit up with a smile. It felt warm. 

"Of course !! Say, do you want to learn about what first ? There's handling, the ways to swing, nails arts, and oh, the types of metal, sizes, shapes ... Oh wait, it's probably better it you heal first. But we can always talk about it !"

"I'd love to."

It was a nice feeling. For the first time in years, Cloth felt happy. And she liked it.


End file.
